She Would Have Been 5 Today...

Wrigley would have been 5 today. Wish I could stay in bed and never get out. Can't write much more.

Other posts about my angel:

http://cakebread17.blogspot.com/2008/02/thinking-of-my-precious-angel.html

http://cakebread17.blogspot.com/2008/04/another-wrigley-moment.html

http://cakebread17.blogspot.com/2008/04/be-happy-mommy.html

http://cakebread17.blogspot.com/2008/06/if-only.html

Update: I forced myself to swim a million+ laps in my parents' pool this morning in an effort to swim away from my pain and grief. Of course, didn't work. My mental state did improve however to a functioning state at least. Spent the rest of the day painting for my mom.

My Dad, A Fire, and a Cracked Rib

First, thank you to everyone who has left comments both on mine and Keith's blogs. It meant a lot to both of us. The blogosphere is so awesome.

My dad came home from the hospital today. He is looking and feeling so much better. Lots of color in his face, walking really well and talking a lot. Obviously, he's still really really tired but the worst is over. Lots of meds to take so I made him a big chart - such a Virgo/dorky thing I know - but he liked it so that's all I care about.

My bro and sis-in-law went back to Tucson yesterday. Keith is in a play and had a performance at noon. They'll be back on Thursday to help out as well.

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We have a lot of family lore that is hysterical but none is as famous as the Great Kitchen Fire of (circa) 1978. Since it's Dad Week, it's only appropriate that I tell this story (with dad's approval of course, plus he's sitting right next to me). Of course, he is the main player.

For many many many years, my dad would get irritated if we brought up this story or told it to others. For us, all we could do is laugh while we told it. About a month ago, I asked dad if I could put it on my blog. He actually laughed a bit and said, "Yeah, but which version are you going to write?" Read on....


One Sunday morning, my mom, brother and I were sitting in the living room watching something on tv. I remember it being after church so we were all in our Sunday best.
My dad used to make these huge Sunday breakfasts. He put some bacon grease in a pan to heat up on the stove (yes, he ate like this for a little while in the 70's but stopped a longg time ago). He forgot about it and took a shower. Note - accounts vary about who put the grease on, my mom or dad...and why my dad took a shower after church..i don't remember him going that morning, just me, mom and keith).


Anyway, the three of us were in the living room when I noticed that the dining room wall was reflecting a flickering orange light from the kitchen. I asked my mom, "Why is the dining room wall orange?" With that, we all ran in the kitchen. The stove was on fire. My mom yelled at me, "GO GET YOUR DAD!"

I ran into their bathroom, opened the shower door and yelled, "DAD, THE STOVE IS ON FIRE!" My dad to this day remembers that part well. Luckily, I don't remember actually seeing him in the shower, whew..eek. What I do recall next is running back into the kitchen and seeing my mom trying briefly to put the fire out with water. Next, my dad comes running through the foyer naked except for a towel and dripping wet.

This is where the family controversy starts:

My memory: Dad hits the slick linoleum floor running, slips and loses his towel in the process and proceeds to slide the length of the kitchen, and slam into the kitchen door with his body. He gets up, yells at my mom for putting water on an oil fire while simultaneously grabbing baking soda and puts the fire out....naked.

Keith: Dad slips and falls, barely slides, gets up, grabs the baking soda and puts the fire out. No recollection of him being naked or yelling at my mom. Violently disputes that he slid all the way across the kitchen floor. Doesn't remember going to church that morning.

Mom: Remembers getting yelled at about the water on the oil fire. Says my dad slid through the foyer, from one end of the kitchen to the other and out the door into the carport naked. Doesn't think we went to church that morning.

Dad: Remembers me seeing him naked in the shower while yelling the stove is on fire and running wet wearing only a towel into the kitchen. He remembers slipping and sliding (but doesn't remember how far) while the three of us stood next to each other watching him slide by us. Doesn't recall yelling at my mom about the water on the oil fire or how he put it out. Maybe it's because he cracked two ribs. Doesn't remember going to church.

So here's the thing. We were all in his hospital room the night before his surgery talking about this. While laughing/bickering about whose story was right, I told everyone I was going to blog about this and have my awesome readers decide. So it's up to you to pick the version you like the most. Whichever one has the most votes will be the official family story.

Tired. Time for bed. Dad and I are going for a walk down the street and back. 30 minutes a day..

Update on My Dad

I finally have a few minutes to sit down and blog a bit. My dad is doing well. He is now out of the cardiac icu which is wonderful. He did extremely well during the surgery which his doc attributes to his healthy lifestyle and positive attitude.

This week has been really tough seeing my dad in pain..so many tubes coming out of him..getting him up out of bed to walk..but as of today he got his last tube out. He is only on oxygen now for the duration of his hospital stay. Hopefully he'll get out on Monday but we'll see.

The nurses in the icu were phenomenal. We were so impressed with them. My dad was very interested in each and every one and made it a point to get to know them all. They all thought he was soo cute. None of us wanted him to leave the icu because they took care of him so incredibly well. The nurses on his current floor are fine but nothing like the icu nurses. I need to pick up a card or flowers as a thank you to them.

My brother, sis-in-law, and I have been trying to help my mom all week but it's been tough. She's pretty stubborn and set in her ways so she's still trying to do everything herself. I think we've worn her down a little though because today she let my brother and sis-in-law run errands for her. Keith has been taking care of the pool and did a little yard work for her as well. Baby steps with her, I tell ya.. Paul and Hunter drove down last night to help which has been great.

My parents started remodeling my old room about 6 months ago and since it still isn't done, I called a friend of mine who owns a construction company to come finish it tomorrow. My mom wasn't too thrilled but I took her to Lowe's today to get the rest of the materials. My dad is relieved though. I just didn't want to have him worry about any of it when he comes home.

We're all pretty stressed so there has been the occasional bickering at one another which is bound to happen with all of us in the house together. Example: After everyone was home from the hospital, we went out to dinner last night which turned out to be a disaster. Long story short - I wanted to hide under the table and pretend I wasn't related to both my mom and Piper. I felt sooo sorry for our waiter.

Pip and I will be here another week. My mother in law watched her for a few nights which was heaven for her since she doesn't get to see Pip as often as she'd like. Luckily she wants her back more this week which works out well so I can help after my dad gets home. My brother and his wife need to leave for Tucson tomorrow at 8am. He's in a play which starts at 12pm so they need to hustle out of here. Paul and Hunter will drive back to Vegas on Monday.

That's about it for now. Need to go outside and paint chair rails and crown moulding so my friend can install tomorrow. I think it might rain in a few hours, great.

ps. we've been writing down all the funny things my dad has said in the hospital. Since some of them were drug-induced, they've been hysterical. I'll have to save that for my next post.

pps. thanks to the 19 or so people who voted for me on hotblogger.com. just had a chance to check it. As they always say, maybe next year.

Prayers for My Dad

My dad had a quadruple bypass today. This came out of nowhere so we're all still in shock. He's in a lot of pain but did very well in the surgery so he should have a full recovery. The best news of all is that he had absolutely no heart damage at all..Just very blocked arteries.

Yesterday my mom called me mid-day at home. Pip and I had just come home with groceries and I almost didn't answer the phone. So glad I did. I knew instantly something was wrong when I heard my mom trying to compose herself to talk. They had gone to dinner the night before when my dad starting getting chest pains. My mom took him to the emergency room. He was admitted right away. Yesterday morning after several tests, they determined 3 of his arteries were at least 60% blocked. Since my dad is healthy, eats right and takes lots of walks, they think it was from all of the smoking he did for almost 30 years. He stopped about 20 years ago but it was too late. The damage was done.

After I hung up with my mom, I called my brother, then my husband. I picked up Hunter after school, came home, packed up Piper and me then drove from Vegas to Phoenix in record time. I felt horrible for leaving Hunter but he started school yesterday and I didn't want to yank him out without knowing exactly what was going on with my dad. He's 14 so he can take care of himself after school until Paul comes home.

5 hours later, I dropped Pip off at my mother-in-law's and raced to my mom's house. It was about 11pm at that point. My brother had come in from Tucson, we were all emotional and exhausted so we went to bed.

This morning we got up at 5:30a to be at the hospital by 6:15a. My dad was going into surgery at 7:30 so we wanted to spend some time with him before he went in. Long story short- his surgery was rescheduled till 12pm. My uncle (dad's brother) came so we all spent the morning with my dad laughing and talking. My dad was in a great mood, joking with the nurses and us. He said he was ready to get this done and just start feeling better. He'd been fatigued for so long now which we now know was attributed to this.

Watching him go into surgery was one of the scariest moments of my life. Seeing him afterwards was even worse. My dad, my daddy. Looking so pale and frail and even worse seeing him in so much pain was more than my mom, brother and me could bare. We were there when they took the breathing tube out which was so rough for him. They told him not to talk for awhile but he tried to talk right away. My dad loves to talk. It made us all smile.

My oldest son Jake came to the hospital so my dad go to see him for a bit. He is 19 now and moved back to Phoenix after he graduated from high school. My ex-husband Mike (the boys' dad) even came and sat with us awhile while my dad was in recovery. That in itself was huge for all of us.

They ended up taking 2 veins out of my dad's legs instead of one because they were weak. The veins are needed for the bypasses. In the end, they did the quadruple instead of the triple but as I said, he sailed through it as best as a patient could. He was breathing great after the tube was out, his blood work looked great, his nurses were amazing so even though we were extremely upset seeing him in so much pain, we knew he was in good hands. He has 6 weeks of recovery ahead of him but the hardest part is over.

I'm here at my mom's now getting ready for bed. Don't know next time I'll post..Please send prayers for my dad. He's going to need them for the days ahead.

Mama's Fun Weird

The kids and I were at Baskin Robbins yesterday picking up Hunter's birthday cake..We stood in line foreverrrrrrrrrrrrr. There was only 1 girl there and about 10 people in line. The mother in front of me was ordering like..everything..I so wanted an ice cream myself when I realized how large she was. That smacked me back into the realization that I could look like that some day if I eat all that friggin ice cream. No ice cream for mama...

Somehow Hunter and I started talking about old people. He said that he's noticed that old people act really weird and strange. I was about to laugh when he said, "I bet you're gonna be a weird old person Mom."

Me: "HUH?" "What?"
Him: " I don't mean weird weird, I mean fun weird."
Me: "Wa?"
Him: "Well, you're weird already so it just means you'll be weirder when you're old."

So now I know what my middle child thinks of me....

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Next conversation went something like this in the freakin-forever-line at Baskin Robbins:

Hunter: "Man, this is taking forever! All these people in line are gonna get mad."
Me: "Who cares if they get mad."
Hunter: "They're all going to get out their AK47's and bust a cap in here."
Me: "That's ok. I'd stop the bullets with my invisible bullet-proof bracelets."

People behind Hunter stare at me.

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Finally at the register:

Ice Cream Cashier: "Ma'am how long have you been standing in line with this cake?
Me: about to answer when large lady in front of me answers for me "About 20 minutes!"
Me: "Actually about 10."
Cashier: "Well, you're going to need to put that one back and get another because this one is probably already melted."

What I wanted to say:

"Well, if you store would manage it's staffing properly, it wouldn't be melted now would it? Now be a good little minimum wage cashier and ring me up damn it."

What I really said:

"I don't want another one. This doesn't look melted. I'll just stick it in the freezer when we get home. Ring me up please."

Darn kids. I hate always having to do the right thing around them.
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Later last night on the way to Hunter's birthday dinner -

Piper: "Mom is poop really food?"
Me: "Huh? Well, our bodies take all of the good stuff from the food then poops out what it doesn't need so yeah, I guess poop is old food."
Paul: "But you can't eat it though."
Hunter: "Can't you?"
All: "Ug, gross, yuck, ick..."


Hunter: "Mom, why doesn't SpongeBob like anyone in the cartoon?"
Me: "You mean like-like or just like?"
Hunter: "Like-Like"
Me: "HaHaHaHa! Maybe cuz it's a show for kids..?"
Hunter: "Jimmy Neutron likes that blonde girl on his cartoon."
Me: "Hmm..Good point. Doesn't SpongeBob like Sandy Cheeks?"
Paul: "I think SpongeBob like guys."
Me: "Babe, stop! Piper's going to end up warped!"
Hunter: "Yeah, I think he likes Patrick." imitating Patrick "SpongeBob stop that...."
Me: "Hunter!"
Paul: Imitating Squidward "Oh SpongeBob don't stop.."
Me: "You guys stop!"
Hunter: "I totally get it now."

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My family is warped...and it's mostly my fault...I luv it..

Blessings

Two wonderful things have happened in the last couple of days.

First, my son Hunter came home on Saturday after spending the summer with his dad. He is such a mama's boy so it's always hard for me when he's away. In the past, he'd usually come home sad that he had to leave his dad but as the years pass it's been getting easier. This year he bounced off the plane, had a huge smile on his face and gave his mama a big bear hug. I thought his little sister was going to eat him up at the airport. When we got home, he jumped on his bed, laid there and said "Ahhh, it's great to be home." Talk about music to my ears..I can't believe he's turning 14next week.

About a month ago, I took Piper to the doctor because she had a slight fever for a day or two. The fever ended up to be nothing but the dr. picked up what he thought was a heart murmur. He warned me that it could be an innocent murmur which is actually pretty common in kids and is completely harmless. It didn't matter though because I was very upset and freaked out. After our daughter Wrigley passed away, every little thing that happens to Piper is amplified by 100 million gazillion. Long story short, her appointment was not until this morning so this last month has full of worry and what if's.

The best news of all is that it was only an innocent murmur, nothing at all. Paul and I both had tears in our eyes when the pediatric cardiologist told us that her heart is in pristine condition. She was such a trooper at the appointment. No problem getting the ekg or ultrasound. She just laid on the table and kept winking at us while watching Peter Pan.

I thank God every day for giving me our children. I pray daily for their health, safety, well-being and happiness. Sometimes I can get into auto-pilot when I pray..always praying for the same things..so when things happen like this, I know that God still listens no matter what. It reminds me to not forget to thank Him for blessing us in so many ways...and to pray for those parents whose children may not have had the outcome that we had today.

My Jacob

My first born is 19 today. I can't believe it. Where did the time go? I know everyone says this but it really does feel like I just had him yesterday. I remember holding him for the first time, how his soft and smooth his skin felt, how fuzzy his hair was, and how big he was. He was 8 lb 15 3/4 oz. so basically he was a 9 lb baby. The biggest in the nursery. How proud we were.



I don't know why I'm struggling with this birthday as opposed to his 18th. Maybe it's because he's almost my age when I had him. Maybe it's because he's out of high school, moved out and back in Arizona (where we're from) with the rest of our family and friends so I am not with him today. Or maybe because he and his girlfriend have moved in together which has been difficult for me to wrap my head around.

I am full of so much emotion right now thinking about my boy. The rambunctious one. The mischevious one. The sly one. The I-can-fix-anything one. The one who every parent says will drive them to drink or give them gray hairs. I'd give anything to go through those days again with you, Jakey-Poo. I miss them already. I miss the day the bus driver came to the door and said you threw a roller blade wheel at the bus. I miss the day I got a call from the principal (when you were in 3rd grade) because you brought a cap gun on the bus and one of your friends took it out of your backpack and shot it. I miss the day we got the letter from Duke University asking you to test for their 7th grade identification program. I miss when you were about 11 and we used to hide under all the pillows and blankets while your little brother jumped on us. I miss our 'frogging' and 'flicking' fights. I miss your rowdy sleepover parties, going to the beach, riding all the scary rides together at Universal and Disney, bungee jumping with you..everything.

I have always told Jake that even when he is big and tall, he'll always be my baby. When he was younger, he'd always say, "Mom, I will not! I'll be too big to be your baby!" I'd always tell him, "You'll NEVER be too big for that." As a teenager, he'd just smile and rolled his eyes. Well my sweet boy, I am so right. You're still my baby and always will be. I love you..

Princess Pip

We interrupt this continual string of stupid posts to post something actually meaningful and touching. Plus this blogger had an extremely emotional day and wants to focus on something positive. Plus she hasn't posted anything for awhile for her parents or in-laws to appreciate.

The last 2 Saturdays Piper had some Princess dance classes. The first was with Ariel, the second with Cinderella. The girls were all supposed to wear some sort of princess dress up clothes. Pip wanted to wear her Cinderella gown to both.

Where in the movie did Ariel wear a hot pink dress?

Asserting herself as her mommy has taught her.

The following Saturday was the Cinderella class. Getting make-up on.

More assertion: Step off! Cinderella is mine! You can't have her!

Check out her kick at the end..She was trying to imitate another girl who did a high kick at the end of her little walk with Cinderella. I started laughing and hit the stop button..durn it! Pip was pretty proud of herself..Yeahh, that's how she rolls!

Lazy Lily

(Guest Blogger Weith Kick at http://weithkick.blogspot.com/)

We have a fat cat. Her name is Lily

She wasn't always this way. There was a time when she was as lithe as a ballerina, agile and graceful. Somewhere along the way she became a cow, and I don't mean cash.

It could be that since she was born with only 3 feet mobility is more of a challenge for her than that of other four-pawed felines; so getting in a daily dose of cardiovascular exercise proves difficult. But don't let 4 legs, 3 feet and one sad, little stub fool you. Typically, she walks with a limp, BUT when she needs to move she can move. She can run, she can jump. She reminds me of CGI Yoda (as opposed to Muppet Yoda.) He shuffles along with a cane, but when the chips are down he can to kick some serious Dark Side Ass. Put a lightsaber in his ugly, little, green hands and he'll give you an ass-whupping you ain't soon forget, fool.

Lily doesn't give ass-whuppings or any kind of whuppings. She's a lover, not a fighter, and always has been. She's delicate like the declining middle-class, sweet like the smell of my gas, fat like J-Lo's reverent ass.

Her brother Theo wasn't so lucky. He was born with only 3 legs. He was a wonderful pet. More dog than cat. He wasn't at all independent like how cats are supposed to be. He was codependent and in need of constant attention. He followed you everywhere and "meowed" incessantly if you weren't around. To the point where you wanted to sell him off to the neighborhood Chinese restaurant. When he died suddenly and inexplicably at the age 7 we were heartbroken. As was his sister, fat Lily. Lazy Lily.

It was after his death that her weight began to mushroom. Could it be that she sunk into a deep depression because of his death? I think not. You see, Theo, not only codependent, was insanely jealous and possessive of Misty and me. No one could have us but him. When Lily came into the same room we were in he would chase her out. When we were lucky enough to give Lily attention he unhappily allowed it. From a distance he watched as we showered her with love. But as soon as we stopped, the moment we left the room or focused our attentions elsewhere he would attack her and the cat fight would ensue. When Theo was alive Lily was forced to exercise, keeping her fit and trim.

Theo was a lover too, but he was a selfish lover. All love had to be directed toward him and then he was the sweetest, kindest cat. He ruled the house. He got more attention than even our dogs did. He demanded it. But he loved people. I think he was bitter toward Lily because she had 4 legs and he 3. When they fought he would always go for her Achilles' heel. Literally. He attacked her where she was most vulnerable, on her sad, little, stubby paw.

My theory behind Lily's weight gain is lack of torture by her brother. Now that Theo is gone she is the top cat. When Theo was around she was quiet and shy. Now it's as though she's been taken over by Theo's spirit. She meows a lot more and expects a lot more attention from us. There is no need for her to do anything all day but eat and sleep. There's no need for sharing. And while she may be lazy, she is also lovely. Lovely Lily.

Piper's Dance Recital/Grandparent Visit

Piper had her dance recital this weekend. As you can imagine, it was very cute, all the girls looked adorable, and there were tons of great dances from girls ranging from about 3 to 18. Pip's class was no exception. The girls looked like little models. They danced to 'Rad Moves' from The Backyardigans. One of the funniest things was at the end of their dance. A little background first - Some of you may have read an older post of mine where I described one of our after dinner clean up activities: break-dancing. Check out the picture of the hub at the bottom where I caught him in a break dance pose smiling at the camera.

Anyway, at the end of the girls' dance they were supposed to sashe off the stage. Instead, my child decides to lay on the stage and pose just like her daddy's breakdancing move. This was SO not part of their routine but it was SO FUNNY because she struck the pose and KEPT IT until they finally got hustled off the stage. The audience (at least around us) was going nuts. The hub, me, my mom, dad, mother-in-law and Harvey where laughing hysterically. We weren't allowed to video or take pictures since it was professionally video'd (aka: yet-another-way-to-suck-money-out-of-the-parents-besides-making-us-pay-$60-for-the-costumes-without-getting-the-girls'-measurements-then-telling-us-we're-responsible-for-any-alterations...but that is another story), so I'll post the the video when I get it. Anyhoo, their routine was the cutest thing ever. We were so proud of Pip and celebrated at her fave restaraunt, Red Robin, afterwards.

After dinner, Pip was teaching her daddy some of the dance moves from her routine. I wish I had filmed more of it but we were laughing so hard I didn't even think to grab the camera until the last minute. Here's a bit of it:

Saturday was also my dad's 29th AA sobriety birthday. I can't believe it's been 29 years. I know it couldn't have been easy all of these years but he did it. Not only for himself but for our family. We went through a lot back then but it was worth it. We celebrated his success along with Pip this weekend as well. Happy 29th Dad! We are all very proud of you!

This morning both grandmas had some 'recital' gifts for Pip. Note to self: put some tap shoes on, pretend your in a recital so you'll get gifts too. From Grandma she got a cool fashion doll dress up magnet set. Remember our old paper dolls with the fold over tabs? This is SO much cooler. From her nana, she got a Fancy Nancy tutu, tiara, earring and shoe dress up kit. Put them all together and you have this:

Saying good bye to the grandparents today:

Pip, her Grandma & Harvey

Pip, her Nana, and Grandma

Pip with Grandpa

Pip, Nana and Grandpa

I wish her brothers could have been here but they're in Arizona with their dad at the moment. Don't worry guys, you'll see the video soon! Your sister misses you guys!

Boo Hoo..I'm Bummed

My brother and sister in law just left today. We are all sad. It's always so much fun when they come and visit. Hunter is especially close to his uncle so he was down when he came home from school today.

These are the times when it sucks to live away from your family..Not in the mood to write much more tonight.

Happy Mommy's Day!

I had a very nice Mother's Day. We moved a little slow because of our party the night before but that was fine with us. The kids and Paul woke me up with some funny cards and gifts then we went to the clubhouse for an absolutely fabulous brunch. We ran into some of the families who came to our party. One really funny guy asked us "So after last night are we allowed back again?" Hysterical! He's so funny. Yes, definitely come back and hang out with us again Lindsey, Scott, Hunter and Jakey!

We didn't take too many pictures but here are a few at brunch.

Disneyland

Some pictures of our Disneyland trip this weekend. It was so much fun watching Pip discover Disneyland for the first time. Hunter had a choir concert while we were there so he spent Saturday running around the park with his friends.

Check out this fab video of Hunter fighting Darth Maul at the Jedi Training Academy in Tomorrowland. He's going to kill me for posting this. Hunter SO won this fight ;-)

So You Think You Can Dance

After dinner break dancing:

I can't believe I got this picture below. It was a split second pose while he was spinning (or trying to). Hysterical.

Just found this picture of Hunter on my camera. He must have taken it while we were cleaning up. Nice nostril bo-bo. Love his freckles.

Day at the Park

We took the dogs to the dog park yesterday. It was hysterical watching them run around with a bunch of other dogs.

We walked down to the kid's park after that.

Walking back to the truck. Pip thought Daddy could walk better with a dog bowl on his face.

(and yes that is Napoleon Dynamite on Paul's shirt - we love Napoleon!)

Dogs, Closet Ball..My Closet is a Mess!

I finally got a picture of the dogs together and actually looking at me (or somewhat). Pip helped a lot.

We have a family game called Closet Ball that we like to play. Last night we played a few rounds but as usual it turned to Piper wanting to bury her daddy in dirty clothes.

Covering Paul in clothes

Hunter in the hamper. Ick.

Seriously, look at my closet. Guess who gets to clean the mess up after.

After, the kids bug Paul while he's in the bathroom.

This is what I looked like as the night wound down (product of a pillow fight)