Update on My Dad

I finally have a few minutes to sit down and blog a bit. My dad is doing well. He is now out of the cardiac icu which is wonderful. He did extremely well during the surgery which his doc attributes to his healthy lifestyle and positive attitude.

This week has been really tough seeing my dad in pain..so many tubes coming out of him..getting him up out of bed to walk..but as of today he got his last tube out. He is only on oxygen now for the duration of his hospital stay. Hopefully he'll get out on Monday but we'll see.

The nurses in the icu were phenomenal. We were so impressed with them. My dad was very interested in each and every one and made it a point to get to know them all. They all thought he was soo cute. None of us wanted him to leave the icu because they took care of him so incredibly well. The nurses on his current floor are fine but nothing like the icu nurses. I need to pick up a card or flowers as a thank you to them.

My brother, sis-in-law, and I have been trying to help my mom all week but it's been tough. She's pretty stubborn and set in her ways so she's still trying to do everything herself. I think we've worn her down a little though because today she let my brother and sis-in-law run errands for her. Keith has been taking care of the pool and did a little yard work for her as well. Baby steps with her, I tell ya.. Paul and Hunter drove down last night to help which has been great.

My parents started remodeling my old room about 6 months ago and since it still isn't done, I called a friend of mine who owns a construction company to come finish it tomorrow. My mom wasn't too thrilled but I took her to Lowe's today to get the rest of the materials. My dad is relieved though. I just didn't want to have him worry about any of it when he comes home.

We're all pretty stressed so there has been the occasional bickering at one another which is bound to happen with all of us in the house together. Example: After everyone was home from the hospital, we went out to dinner last night which turned out to be a disaster. Long story short - I wanted to hide under the table and pretend I wasn't related to both my mom and Piper. I felt sooo sorry for our waiter.

Pip and I will be here another week. My mother in law watched her for a few nights which was heaven for her since she doesn't get to see Pip as often as she'd like. Luckily she wants her back more this week which works out well so I can help after my dad gets home. My brother and his wife need to leave for Tucson tomorrow at 8am. He's in a play which starts at 12pm so they need to hustle out of here. Paul and Hunter will drive back to Vegas on Monday.

That's about it for now. Need to go outside and paint chair rails and crown moulding so my friend can install tomorrow. I think it might rain in a few hours, great.

ps. we've been writing down all the funny things my dad has said in the hospital. Since some of them were drug-induced, they've been hysterical. I'll have to save that for my next post.

pps. thanks to the 19 or so people who voted for me on hotblogger.com. just had a chance to check it. As they always say, maybe next year.

Prayers for My Dad

My dad had a quadruple bypass today. This came out of nowhere so we're all still in shock. He's in a lot of pain but did very well in the surgery so he should have a full recovery. The best news of all is that he had absolutely no heart damage at all..Just very blocked arteries.

Yesterday my mom called me mid-day at home. Pip and I had just come home with groceries and I almost didn't answer the phone. So glad I did. I knew instantly something was wrong when I heard my mom trying to compose herself to talk. They had gone to dinner the night before when my dad starting getting chest pains. My mom took him to the emergency room. He was admitted right away. Yesterday morning after several tests, they determined 3 of his arteries were at least 60% blocked. Since my dad is healthy, eats right and takes lots of walks, they think it was from all of the smoking he did for almost 30 years. He stopped about 20 years ago but it was too late. The damage was done.

After I hung up with my mom, I called my brother, then my husband. I picked up Hunter after school, came home, packed up Piper and me then drove from Vegas to Phoenix in record time. I felt horrible for leaving Hunter but he started school yesterday and I didn't want to yank him out without knowing exactly what was going on with my dad. He's 14 so he can take care of himself after school until Paul comes home.

5 hours later, I dropped Pip off at my mother-in-law's and raced to my mom's house. It was about 11pm at that point. My brother had come in from Tucson, we were all emotional and exhausted so we went to bed.

This morning we got up at 5:30a to be at the hospital by 6:15a. My dad was going into surgery at 7:30 so we wanted to spend some time with him before he went in. Long story short- his surgery was rescheduled till 12pm. My uncle (dad's brother) came so we all spent the morning with my dad laughing and talking. My dad was in a great mood, joking with the nurses and us. He said he was ready to get this done and just start feeling better. He'd been fatigued for so long now which we now know was attributed to this.

Watching him go into surgery was one of the scariest moments of my life. Seeing him afterwards was even worse. My dad, my daddy. Looking so pale and frail and even worse seeing him in so much pain was more than my mom, brother and me could bare. We were there when they took the breathing tube out which was so rough for him. They told him not to talk for awhile but he tried to talk right away. My dad loves to talk. It made us all smile.

My oldest son Jake came to the hospital so my dad go to see him for a bit. He is 19 now and moved back to Phoenix after he graduated from high school. My ex-husband Mike (the boys' dad) even came and sat with us awhile while my dad was in recovery. That in itself was huge for all of us.

They ended up taking 2 veins out of my dad's legs instead of one because they were weak. The veins are needed for the bypasses. In the end, they did the quadruple instead of the triple but as I said, he sailed through it as best as a patient could. He was breathing great after the tube was out, his blood work looked great, his nurses were amazing so even though we were extremely upset seeing him in so much pain, we knew he was in good hands. He has 6 weeks of recovery ahead of him but the hardest part is over.

I'm here at my mom's now getting ready for bed. Don't know next time I'll post..Please send prayers for my dad. He's going to need them for the days ahead.

Nirvana and Paul Anka Don't Suck..Neither Do My Farts

My husband seems to think that his farts don't stink. He's allowed to let 'em rip whenever and wherever with no repurcussion. Hunter and I however are strung up whenever we fart. Example: Tonight we went out for a walk with the dogs when Hunter pushed one out. It is well known in our family that the kid could kill a moose with how rank his toots are (personally I don't know). Since he has this insane talent to make all of his farts silent, they tend to creep up on Paul and surprise him. He gets busted pretty frequently inside the house and car, especially on road trips when we're all trapped. That's his speciality.

Tonight we're outside when Hunter let a silent but violent one. Paul makes that mushed up face and says "AW Hunter! That's disgusting!" I say, "So when is it crime to fart outside? He's not in the car or house. Don't worry about it." Paul says, "It just isn't right when he walks by me and does it." So Hunter walked by him again and let out a LOUD one this time. My kid haz skills...

Paul gets irritated. I told him to stop being so freaked out about it..then I let one go about 10 feet in front of him so he had to walk through it. He smelled it, made that disgusting face, and started in again on Hunter. I told him I did it, Hunter and I started laughing, gave each other the high five and kept walking.

Not 10 minutes before, the man was in the kitchen letting them rip and laughing about it. I've seen him do it in the dogs' faces, Hunter's face and even occasion, Pip's face. Gee, that's not messed up at all. Note: If you don't ever see another post from me, it's cuz my husband read this and buried me in the backyard. Long story short-My husband is a fart hypocrite.

Maybe I was too hard on him but it's been a long weekend. Hunter's birthday was Friday (I'd post pics but I dropped my camera and broke it..don't even get me started), then yesterday Hunter and Paul both woke up sick with fevers and Piper's allergies were flaring up. All I did yesterday was run between the three of them, taking temps, giving meds, and making soup..oh yeah, and wiping snot.

So it comes as no surprise that this morning I woke up feeling like crap while everyone else was fine. Do I get a thanks for yesterday? No. Paul and Pip jump on the bed, "Let's go to church!" I said let's not go this morning, mommy doesn't feel good. Do they care? No. Piper lays on the toddler guilt, "But Mom, I wanna go to church to learn about God."

We went. Right?

I'm so glad we went because the message was great today, however, mama still feels all ucky.

Cut to coming home, eating lunch, putting Pip down for nap, then running out with Hunter for some last minute school supplies, dinner...Yeah, I'm not tired or anything.

Now I'm sitting here watching the Olympics closing ceremony drinking vino..Not feelin it. Why are those guys beating on big cheese drums?

Oh yeah, I'm channel surfing on Sirius in the Green Monster today when I hear a song that sounds familiar. It's Paul Anka singing Nirvana's Smells Like Teen Spirit..No way...It's awesome..Am I old? Dunno but it was cool..I'm cool.

Ok, maybe not so cool. I can't the YouTube video embedded. Here's the link. Go see Anka swing to Nirvana..then go to bed or something.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TsS811o21-k

I'm a Whack Job

I love being the (might be) bad girl.

http://swirlgirlspearls.blogspot.com/2008/08/peace-out.html

Mama's Fun Weird

The kids and I were at Baskin Robbins yesterday picking up Hunter's birthday cake..We stood in line foreverrrrrrrrrrrrr. There was only 1 girl there and about 10 people in line. The mother in front of me was ordering like..everything..I so wanted an ice cream myself when I realized how large she was. That smacked me back into the realization that I could look like that some day if I eat all that friggin ice cream. No ice cream for mama...

Somehow Hunter and I started talking about old people. He said that he's noticed that old people act really weird and strange. I was about to laugh when he said, "I bet you're gonna be a weird old person Mom."

Me: "HUH?" "What?"
Him: " I don't mean weird weird, I mean fun weird."
Me: "Wa?"
Him: "Well, you're weird already so it just means you'll be weirder when you're old."

So now I know what my middle child thinks of me....

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Next conversation went something like this in the freakin-forever-line at Baskin Robbins:

Hunter: "Man, this is taking forever! All these people in line are gonna get mad."
Me: "Who cares if they get mad."
Hunter: "They're all going to get out their AK47's and bust a cap in here."
Me: "That's ok. I'd stop the bullets with my invisible bullet-proof bracelets."

People behind Hunter stare at me.

-------

Finally at the register:

Ice Cream Cashier: "Ma'am how long have you been standing in line with this cake?
Me: about to answer when large lady in front of me answers for me "About 20 minutes!"
Me: "Actually about 10."
Cashier: "Well, you're going to need to put that one back and get another because this one is probably already melted."

What I wanted to say:

"Well, if you store would manage it's staffing properly, it wouldn't be melted now would it? Now be a good little minimum wage cashier and ring me up damn it."

What I really said:

"I don't want another one. This doesn't look melted. I'll just stick it in the freezer when we get home. Ring me up please."

Darn kids. I hate always having to do the right thing around them.
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Later last night on the way to Hunter's birthday dinner -

Piper: "Mom is poop really food?"
Me: "Huh? Well, our bodies take all of the good stuff from the food then poops out what it doesn't need so yeah, I guess poop is old food."
Paul: "But you can't eat it though."
Hunter: "Can't you?"
All: "Ug, gross, yuck, ick..."


Hunter: "Mom, why doesn't SpongeBob like anyone in the cartoon?"
Me: "You mean like-like or just like?"
Hunter: "Like-Like"
Me: "HaHaHaHa! Maybe cuz it's a show for kids..?"
Hunter: "Jimmy Neutron likes that blonde girl on his cartoon."
Me: "Hmm..Good point. Doesn't SpongeBob like Sandy Cheeks?"
Paul: "I think SpongeBob like guys."
Me: "Babe, stop! Piper's going to end up warped!"
Hunter: "Yeah, I think he likes Patrick." imitating Patrick "SpongeBob stop that...."
Me: "Hunter!"
Paul: Imitating Squidward "Oh SpongeBob don't stop.."
Me: "You guys stop!"
Hunter: "I totally get it now."

---
My family is warped...and it's mostly my fault...I luv it..

HAHAHAHAHAHA..Hot Blogger?!?! HAHAHAHAHA

Someone anonymously nominated me for the HotBlogger. calendar, woohoo! Maybe it was luck or maybe..my..pathetic...hint..on..my..blog.. I dunno. Anyway, thanks to you whomever it was!

So, now the hard part. I need votes! This oughta be good. I already feel like I'm gonna get mayyybe 1 vote. C'mon..Perk up a stay-at-home mom's self-esteem/ego. Gimme some sugah (votes) baby! That would be soo cool to be photoshop'd within an inch of my life on this calendar, I can't even begin to tell you.

What can I do in return? Hmm..I doubt we can find out who actually votes but if so, I'll be happy to give you some Lizard Linky Love here..Or I think I have a Target gift card somewhere. I'm SO not above bribes so name it..Need a place to stay FREE in Vegas? I'll hook you up in our guest house..Need some swing or latin dance lessons? I'm your chick.

Voting starts on August 25th..I'm not sure how many times one can vote but hopefully it'll be more than once..

Wow..Maybe this will bring me to my really big dream of being on Dancing With The Stars! Maybe even the DWTS video! Ok, I know that's reachin but I'm just sayin..

I have a feeling this is gonna get really ugly on twitter..

Time For Some Back-To-School Drinkin For Mama

Let me prefice this by saying that I love my son Hunter with all the mite that you'd expect a mother to have. Sometimes I think he's my biggest fan in the world. That said, I never want to go school clothes shopping with him again. Especially to my favorite outlet mall where I couldn't go into the shops I wanted to.

Man cannot live by black t-shirts and tan shorts alone. This however seemed to bounce off my thick-headed son. I tried reasoning with him: "We live in the desert. It's hot. Black retains heat. You'll be sweating all the time." No dice. "People will think you're all goth." Didn't work. "You gotta mix it up a little." Nothing.

Me: Do you like this shirt?
Him: No. Too much design.
Me: This one?
Him: I don't want anything on the back of the shirt.
Me: Whadda about this one?
Him: I don't like the color.

Then we looked for shorts.

Me: Do you like these shorts?
Him: No
Me: Do you like these shorts?
Him: No
Me: C'mon, what about these ones? These are cool. I like the funky design.
Him: No, I don't like them. They're skater shorts. I'm not a skater.
Me: You don't have to be a skater to wear them.
Him: Yes, you do.
Me: Then why do you wear Vans then?
Him: Not just skaters wear them.

It doesn't help when the 3 year old in a stroller grabbing at everything we passed. Belts flying, t-shirts dropping from shelves. I was standing there at one point watching my stoic faced son looking at shirts and my daughter acting like a little crapper when I went all Jenny-like from Forrest Gump, "Dear God, please make me a bird so I can fly far far away." It didn't work.

Whoever the genius was that invented those dumb little rides that toddlers can ride on should be drawn and quartered. Piper wanted to ride them despite the fact that they were burning hot to the touch. I finally let her ride a rocketship that she could climb inside (so it wasn't really hot) but as soon as I put my 2 quarters in, she freaked out because she thought it was going to take off so she jumped out. My quarters gone + other scalding rides that aren't scary = a pissed off toddler who can't ride them.

Why is it that clothing stores switch to winter clothes starting in August. Sweaters, jackets, cute umbrellas and rainboots. Rainboots? Umbrellas? In Vegas? Who is the buyer for this store? Don't they follow regional weather trends? I know the logic of buying winter stuff in advance but seriously people, get a grip. It's rained here like 2 times since we moved here 2 years ago! Anyway, I was looking for some playdresses for the little crapper so we go into one of my fave kids' store, A Childrens' Place. Stop. It's all WINTER STUFF. NOT ONE SUMMERY PLAYDRESS. WTF?!?!?!? Robin has officially hit her breaking point.

I yell in the store, "IT IS OVER 100 DEGREES OUTSIDE! WHY IS THERE ONLY WINTER CLOTHES IN HERE! THIS IS RIDICULOUS!"

to which my son replies, "Um mom, that was kinda loud."

Me: "I KNOW! IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!" Out of the store we go.

The ride to the outlet mall was a joy. Piper told Hunter continually that I wasn't his mom. I was only her and Jakey's mom. He just played his PSP, nodded and said "uh-huh" a lot which continued to enrage her. She then told him that she liked Jakey more than him. Hunter was all "fine, fine, fine" which again didn't bode well for a peaceful drive. A round of this followed: "You're a stinky butthead!" "No, you are!" "No, YOU are!" NOOOO, YOOOOOOOU AREEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Wait. Who is the soon to be 14 year old participating in this yelling match?

THEN, Pip saw a billboard with a gorilla on it. For 10 minutes, she went on some tirade about how she loves King Kong but she hates him, but she loved the movie (she hasn't seen it, what kind of mom do you think i am?), how she wanted to watch it when we got home because she loved him. I said No which I think may have lead to Hunter telling her to be quiet which I think led to the stinky butthead conversation.

It sure was a productive day. We left the mall with one t-shirt, Quicksilver. At least it was white.

Think of me while I'm passed out on the floor tonight.